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Miss Pee Pee

1998

On our first Carnival Cruise to the Caribbean on Tropical, I had a traumatic happening that I learned a valuable lesson from. Don’t sit on the front row at the nightly shows unless you want to be part of it!

Shortly after the beginning of a show one night while we were at sea, I left the front row area when the lights began to dim, so as not to disturb the comedian when he came out on stage.

As I gingerly found my way out, the star of the night singled me out saying "I know where you’re going!" saying it in a sing-song manner so as to be funny. "Mention my name and you’ll get a good seat!" The spotlight was on me all the way up the aisle.

While I was gone from the theatre, he told Richie and all the people we were sitting with (they were all our dinner mates) to go sit somewhere else and he brought in total strangers from elsewhere in the auditorium to fill their seats.

When I came back in the dark, feebly finding my way to our area, I couldn’t find Richie or the people who’d been sitting with us.

A little known side effect of Glaucoma prescription eye drops is that there is no perceptible change in your pupils to accommodate light or dark so dark is really black! The comedian couldn’t have known this, but it turned out to be a mean trick to play on a little old white haired lady : (

Finally, seeing my confusion, he spoke to me and again the spotlight came on showing my total frustration.

I was truly a good deal frustrated by this time and I hollared out to him "Yes I mentioned your name in there, but they said they’d never heard of you!"

It got an uproarious laugh from the audience, and he congratulated me for being a good sport, and moved all the people back to their original seats where they belonged.

Howevah for the rest of the cruise I was known as Miss Pee Pee! Everywhere I went in the dining room, in the hallways, on the deck! Everywhere!

We flew home from Puerto Rico and had to change planes in Ft. Lauderdale, where we’d never been before.

A lady I did not know, dragging her luggage behind her, tugged at my shirt and said, "Bye, Bye, Miss Pee Pee have a safe flight!" Then she giggled her way out of sight.

I know she thought she was being funny, but it just brought back the embarrassment of that night in the show lounge floundering my way around in the pitch darkness!

Some things aren’t all that funny to people who are night blind.

I learned a valuable lesson...I never, ever sit near the stage when on a cruise!

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